Yellowstone or Bust! Day 6

Thursday, June 27, 2013. In the interest of brevity based on my intense need for some sleep, I will give just a recap of today’s activities. The parentheses following each bullet are my random thoughts and impressions.

• Wake up. (What time is it? 6:20? OMG that is just too early! I shouldn’t have stayed up so late blogging last night. When will I learn?)
• Answer phone. (It’s Mariah! How nice! Oh, she’s wishing me Happy Birthday. God that’s right I’m 54 now. That’s ancient! Like dinosaur bones! I feel every minute of it right now. It’s good to hear from home. I wish my kids were here!)
• Dress. Pack. Carry stuff to van. (No thoughts. Head is empty.)
• Eat breakfast. (This granola keeps growing! I’m chewing as fast as I can and I know everyone is waiting on me. Even Sierra is ready before me. Chew! Chew!)
• Receive cupcake with a birthday candle from Dan. (Awwww! That is so nice! Now I have chocolate for a lunch treat. Everyone is singing Happy Birthday. Awwww! Damn, I’m old!)
• Pass: Boiling River area where we went last night. (Man that was fun! I can’t believe how strong that current was – and how hot that water from the hot spring was. I want to do it again!)
• Pass: 45th parallel sign. (This spot is midway between the equator and the North Pole. Interesting! I wish I had a photo of that sign. Oh, well. We passed it already.)
• Stop: Rustic Falls on Glen Creek. (Pretty little falls – and right next to the road. How convenient! Not much traffic this early. It’s going to be a beautiful day!)
• Pass: Sheepeater Cliff. (Perfect columnar basalt. It’s ok not to stop – no one but geology people care about columnar basalt. It really is a perfect example, though.)
• Stop: Open Air Museum by Obsidian Cliff. (This stone and log shelter is really neat – and it’s been here since 1931! It’s one of the first wayside exhibits built in Yellowstone. Oh, and look at this information about rock thieves taking away pieces of obsidian for souvenirs so now it’s not as scenic as it used to be. Hmmmm….would I or wouldn’t I take a little piece of obsidin?)
• Pass: Obsidian Cliff. (Ok. The stone thieves have all the good stuff anyway.)
• Stop: Near Obsidian Creek, subtitle: Close Encounter of the Bison Kind. (Two bison bulls hanging out in the steam on a thermal area. What a cool picture this will be! What are Deb and Dan doing? They’re taking the trail down closer to the bison. Good idea! They will get some good pictures. Wait a minute…that bison is headed straight for them! Wow, Deb is moving pretty fast! Run, Forrest, run!)
• Stop: Roaring Mountain. (This whole barren mountainside is steaming! And listen to the fumaroles hiss. The sulfur smell is not that bad. Is that runoff cool or hot? I think I’ll touch it and see. Just lukewarm.)
• Stop: Frying Pan Spring. (Seriously – it looks just like water simmering in a pan. This is really neat! Bubble bubble! )
• Pass: Stuff. (There are thermal features everywhere. Just random steam coming out of creeks, lakes, vents. It looks just like a normal area then, bam! Hot water and steam squirting out. We’re climbing. You can look out now and see a whole mountainside – green pine trees, grassy meadows, and steam rising up in multiple places. Bright blue sky, forest green trees, and stark white steam. This place is surreal!)
• Stop: Virginia Cascades. (This is a spectacular drive. The mountain falls straight down next to the road! And the 60-foot falls cascading down into this steep steep canyon is beautiful! Cameras, everyone! Yes, go out on that rock a little more. Dane, be careful! My turn. Your turn. My turn again – I don’t want to look like a wussy girl because I was too scared to stand on the rock. I want a retake standing up. Dane, that pin-up pose with your bison scrotum is too much! LOL!)
• Stop: Cascade Creek Meadows. (Look at that buffalo in his wallow. More bulls are really close to the road. What is he doing? I thought bison peed from underneath like bulls do. But it looks like he is peeing from his butt – and in spurts. What is going on?! Hey, this guy looks like a local. He is! I’m going to sound like a dumbass but I’m going to ask. Bison bulls mark their territory by shooting urine out from behind like a girl bison? That sounds sketchy. But it certainly looked like that is what  he was doing. We’ll have to look that up on Google later.)
• Stop: Hike to brink of Lower Falls. (Look at those elk next to the restrooms! They are right next to the parking lot! Cameras everyone. We are so close. Look at the velvet on their antlers. It looks so soft. The antlers seem too big for the elk’s neck to hold up. Ha! He uses them to scratch under his belly. He is totally aware of where his rack is – look how he lifts them gracefully over those branches. This is incredible! Oh he’s moving on. Let’s hike now. Wow we are right where the falls drop over the edge! The water is hypnotic. It’s rushing so fast. Look at that snow patch on the opposite canyon wall. What a view down the canyon!)
• Stops: Lookout Point. Inspiration Point. Glacial Boulder. Brink of Upper Falls. Uncle Tom’s Trail. (Two osprey nests. Cool. Look, there’s a baby in one. It’s huge! Inspiration point is a bust – I guess when an earthquake knocks the cliff down with the observation platform on it there’s not much you can do so tourists can get a good view. That boulder moved how far in a glacier? 328 steps for yet another view of the falls? Really? Ok, we can do it. A rainbow at the bottom of the falls! Whew, that was strenuous. Look – there is a recliner in the back of that van instead of seats! Are we having lunch soon? Are we ever going to have cell phone reception so these texts will send?)
• Stop: Artist’s Point. (Lunch in the shade in the parking lot? Works for me! I get to eat my birthday cupcake. Throw a flaming hot Cheeto to that bird and see if he likes it. Look at this view! This is like every painting you see of the falls – what a gorgeous place! Totally worth all the hikes and stops we’ve done.)
• Pass: Hayden Valley. (Herds of buffalo. These are mommas and babies. Herds of Canada geese too.)
• Stop: Sulfur Cauldron. (This water is as acidic as battery acid! No wonder it ate away the foundation of the overlook and collapsed it. The ground is bubbling, boiling, steaming. That pool is poisonously green. Look at that bison lying down on the barren ground. Isn’t he hot?)
• Stop: Mud Volcano. (More bubbling boiling frothing steaming pots and pools. We walked all the way to the top and have to turn around because a bison decided to lie down next to the trail? Seriously? Wah! That is ‘Wow’ in Chinese? Dragon’s Mouth is the best! It’s like hell is breathing!)
• Stop: Yellowstone Lake Visitor Center. (Gotta get our passports stamped! I can identify the birds I’ve seen from this exhibit. This lake is immense! Let’s wade in the water. The sand is hot but the water is cold!)
• Stop: Yellowstone KOA in West Yellowstone, Montana. (Here are our little cabins. Let’s get unloaded and get back to town for dinner. I’m hungry again!)
• Stop: West Yellowstone, Montana. (Shopping. Lots of souvenir shops. Gin and Tim bought a buffalo hide for their living room floor. Let’s eat at this pizza and pasta restaurant. Elk Italian Sausage spaghetti? Don’t mind if I do! Dane’s going for the buffalo ravioli. Mmmmm! Tim bought dinner for my birthday. Awwww! That is so nice! Ice cream? Sure! Dan bought ice cream for my birthday? Awwww! This is quite a special day!)
• Stop: Yellowstone KOA in West Yellowstone, Montana. (Shower. Laundry. Blog. Bed. Whew, what a day!)